Signs of players in dating

Yesterday, I blogged about the advice my male friends have for interpreting a guy's mixed signals. Now, I think it's obvious when someone texts you at midnight, asking what you're up to, that he's just looking for sex.Today, as a follow-up, I want to talk today about another writer-lady's very smart advice on how to determine whether or not a guy is a player. But players will also send more innocent-seeming texts, saying stuff like, "Hey — spontaneous invite — wanna grab dinner tonight? I'm free tonight but will probably have to work late through the weekend. " While this kind of informality might come off as charming or enthusiastic, I think you should never agree to a last-minute plan unless you've already been on multiple dates with a guy — or unless you feel confident that he is pretty into you. It will make you uncomfortable or it will seem like a deviation from his typical behavior or both.Certainly, I think chances are very high that any guy who is being overly persistent about sex is most likely a douchebag, no matter how incredibly into you he seems — and I speak from unhappy experience. As for the stuff about texting: If he's doing any — or all three of those things — and you're not sure where you stand with him, or something seems not quite right, I'd be on guard.

Ladies, take it from someone who has been there, please run away if a majority of these signs apply to your current guy. It's so sad, but there are guys out there who slot their Tuesday girl, Wednesday girl, etc. Ladies, he can only give the work and travel excuse so much without it becoming obvious that he might be blowing you off for another date. Could be cool and totally okay if he's reaching out at a decent time, but if he's reaching out pretty late, you know it's a hook up..he might just be scrolling through his phone to pick which girl he wants to play with that night. He is checking his phone while with you, or frequently stepping away to the bathroom on a date (to probably check texts from other women).

You might want to say something like, "Texting can be so distracting — I'd really prefer if you e-mailed me or called me to make plans." Or else say, "Look, considering I don't know you very well, I'd prefer to make plans in advance.

We recently discussed 8 signs of a toxic relationship, where some often-overlooked abusive tendencies came into light for many people.

But the minute you let your guard down and let him into your life, you’ll start to get that nagging suspicion that something’s not right.

Before you even know it, you’ve been played, dumped and left heartbroken in one fell swoop. You don’t have to be dating a guy to tell if he’s probably a player.

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